My wardrobe....my god!

I have never in my life been accused of spending too much time or money on fashion, shoes or my hair. (I recall the look of horror a friend gave me once when she asked to borrow my hairdryer and I told her I didn’t own one. I don’t think I own an iron either.) Those who know me might call me many things – no comments from the peanut gallery thank you - but I’m betting none of them would include trendy, stylish or haute couture.


It is true, I hate shopping. (A gasp echoes across the land of women). I detest clothes shopping in particular, especially in Australia, because there don’t seem to be many Australian women with linebacker shoulders and Lance Armstrong legs (only hairier) who actually want to wear something other than a square t-shirt and stretchy track pants from K-mart. So the clothes that I do manage to find that fit me well I tend to wear to the point of disintegration, or at least see-through, to delay as long as possible the frustrating effort of trudging out to find new ones. And this was before the baby when time was all I had (what DID I do with it all then?).

Enter new baby in life. Time has never been more valuable, work hours must be hopelessly compressed into a precious few per week, me-time is nearly non-existent, so how enthusiastic would I be these days about wardrobe management?

“Perfectly reasonable,” I can hear you thinking, but the other day when I went into my closet to find something to wear, even I was disgusted. The t-shirts I’ve been wearing all summer (and probably for the past two or three before that) have strings hanging off them, buttons missing or are actually becoming see-through. My favourite two pairs of Kathmandu shorts (the only ones in Australia that fit me) are bursting their seams on the inner thighs. My underwear…. I won’t even go there.

Contrast this with my son. Four packages from the States have arrived recently (and more are on the way) from Bode’s nana who has just discovered a kids op-shop near her house. Bode is now super stylin with cool button down shirts, funky plaid shorts, baby surfboard shorts, collared jumpsuits, jean overalls, a SKI ASPEN sweater, John Deere leather boots (yes real leather), Teva water sandals, Hawaiian shirt and shorts outfits that were actually “Made in Hawaii,” and the list goes on.

Bode now runs rings around Ian and I in the style department, and he is certainly the best-dressed person in our house on a daily basis. If it weren’t for the fact that nobody actually looks at me anymore, I would be embarrassed to be seen next to him when we go out around town!

So let’s all spare a thought for all the poor ragtag mums out there (I’m one) wearing four-year old jeans, stretched-out lifeless shirts and stained undergarments. When you see one you know waltzing down the street with her cute little one pimped out in far superior threads to her own, be sure to acknowledge them both and say “Oh look at your baby, isn’t he (she) simply gorgeous!!” Then watch the smile light up her face.