Before Baby: The Original ME

Er.... yes, definitely before baby

Here’s a fun little exercise; it’s one in which I have indulged quite a bit recently and so wanted to invite you to join in. Take a moment to think back and remember your life before you had your children. (I realise that for some of you this is a long time ago!)

Specifically, think about YOU back then and the things you did that gave you enormous pride in yourself. What big accomplishments or little daily victories gave you a sense of strength and fulfilment - made you stand up taller, feel powerful, or fill you with satisfaction, even if you were the only person around to witness it?

At the risk of embarrassing myself, I will share some of my own pre-baby moments in the hope that it might trigger some similar memories for you.
For example, in my corporate career I had a typical fear of public speaking and so forced myself on occasion to overcome that fear by putting my hand up to deliver presentations. In one particular gathering of the entire Oracle corporate marketing department in San Francisco (some 450+ people), I reluctantly agreed to present some findings to the entire roomful of stuffy execs. I walked up on to the stage where the Executive VP of Marketing was waiting with the microphone. Instead of introducing me to the crowd as he had done with every other presenter, he just handed me the microphone without saying a word. Without thinking, I seized this unique opportunity.

“You don’t know my name, do you?” I said to him while speaking directly into the microphone. Everyone fell silent, the VP clenched his jaw and his eyes burned with anger. The room then burst into raucous laughter and the VP stood there fuming through my entire presentation. When I finished I walked back to my seat full of shame at the unintended consequences of my action. I was certain that I would lose my job as this was a proud man who took himself very seriously and was not likely to endure this embarrassment lightly. When I got to my seat though, every person around me shook my hand or back-slapped me. Many winked and said “Well done, that was hilarious,” and for weeks afterwards people walked into my office telling me how everyone was still talking about it.

These aren’t exactly the kind of moments that fill my career resume, but in one spontaneous act I had confidently and very publicly exposed my true personality and irreverence for corporate American hierarchy and conduct. I still grin broadly when I remember that moment, even if it the outcome was somewhat unintentional at the time.

Other memories that lift my chin include one particular night walking into a dance club with my girlfriends when I knew without a doubt that the room belonged to me. I don’t know why, and it has not happened since, but that particular night, I had the eye-popping outfit, the oozing confidence and the sexual mojo that made me seemingly irresistible to every man in the place.

It gives me a buzz to recall the energy that charges through me when I summit a challenging mountain on my bike, or the invincibility I felt when I descended my first mountain peak while heli-skiing in Alaska, white-knuckled with fear and shivering with excitement. And truly, the pride and fulfilment that I feel about my mothering accomplishments these days is no less potent and just as buzz-worthy. But it sure is enjoyable to remember those things that really defined ME in the years before I became wholly redefined. What are some of yours? :)